Undecided.

 

Am I the only one who muttered the word, undecided, to their guidance counselor about what I want to be/do after high school? It feels pretty lonely in this little undecided bubble of mine, but there was a lesson laid on my heart recently, that I feel the need to share... because something tells me that I'm not the only one who has no idea what they want to do for the rest of their life.

So. lately, I've been doing some career research, and mostly digging into the topic of genetics. 

Why? well... I took a few career assessments and the career, geneticist just kept popping back up. so, what did I do? I hopped in my car, drove to the library, and picked out four ginormous books solely based on the concept of genetics.

I whipped out the first book: genetics for dummies [of course], and began to read. However... it wasn't that easy. I had barely finished the first chapter without beginning to think about other things that I needed to do, write down, or just random thoughts that popped up in my head like, "Wow, what if I wore a lab coat all the time and people added "Doctor" just before my last name".

But anyway... back to the point of the story...

I stopped rereading the same sentence out loud for just a moment, and at that moment, the Holy Spirit placed a thought in my head; " If you were truly meant to become a geneticist, you would know it. stop searching for a passion for this field when you know deep down it's not my will for your life. 

But, my prideful self decided, no. I think I was made for this career. My personality matches up perfectly to this career, and I'm not going to give up. I didn't get all these books for nothing. and apparently, that reason was good enough for me... at the time.

However, later on that day the Holy Spirit pressed at my heart again, bringing the topic back up into my mind.

"This career isn't the right one for you."

However, I didn't want to listen. I thought, "but I find genetics so fascinating; I could see myself 10 years in the future in this type of career. 

Abigail. I know you better than you know yourself. I know your future because I was the One who wrote it into existence in the first place."

But I kept pushing the truth away, and protesting.

"I can work hard. I can acheive this. I have the skills!

You may not even enjoy it. This isn't my will for your life."

After arguing with the Spirit and my own flesh, I finally decided God was right.

I was pushing myself too hard to be something I'm not. I was too caught up in the idea of this "perfect job". If I had really loved genetics I would've been able to focus more and be more intrigued by the book. It would just feel right. And it didn't.

I write all of this to say,

Don't try to take your future into your own hands. God's got this! trust in Him. He intentionally wove every detail and facet of your being into existence. He knew you before you existed. 

Jeremiah 1 states,

"I chose you before I formed you in the womb; 

I set you apart before you were born. 

I appointed you a prophet to the nations.

But I protested, "Oh no, Lord God! Look, I don't know how to speak since I am only a youth."

Then the Lord said to me:

Do not say, "I am only a youth,"

for you will go to everyone I send you to

and speak whatever I tell you."

What stuck out to me the most, was the fact that around 2,646 years ago, Jeremiah protested to God, just like I did. Plus, God was teaching Jeremiah a similar lesson to the one He was teaching me.

I needed to trust God with my life, just like Jeremiah did.

I needed to trust God with my skills, just like Jeremiah did.

I needed to trust God with my strengths, just like Jeremiah did.

I needed to trust God with my weaknesses, just like Jeremiah did.

Not only do we need to trust God with our future, but we need to remember that God is in control. Often times we try to take our life into our own hands, but in that very moment is when our life begins to fall apart.

John 15:5

"Apart from me, you can accomplish nothing."

Apart from our creator, we can accomplish nothing in this life. 

Ephesians 2:10

"For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared ahead of time for us to do."

God has prepared good works for you to do. The question is, will you walk in His will for your life, not your own, to accomplish these things?